Sunday, March 02, 2008

help! reality check needed ASAP!

so, our 14 year old daughter,
angelica, laid some heavy
news on us today....shocking
news, in fact. she has been
dating a 16- soon to be 17 year
old boy!! he's a JR in HS &
she's only a FRESHMAN!!

okay, so i've been pretty calm
about all this, but jesse is
not doing as well.

especially, after hearing about
them kissing & saying i love you
& talking about the "future"!!
ding dang, ya'll...i don't know
what to do with all this info!!

whew!! deep breaths beginning
so i don't have a freakin' panic
attack!! he's 2 years & 2 months
older than her!! he'll be graduating
next freakin' YEAR!!!

okay, so obviously the BIGGEST
concern i had is that i've always
been open with Lica & have NEVER
given her a reason not to talk
to me about life stuff...including
freakin' boyfriends. so i must
admit i've had a good cry about
why she didn't tell me about him.
they've already been dating a MONTH
on Wednesday!! and when she's gone
to the mall, she's been meeting up
with him & saturday she met him
in the park!

so, the reason she brought him up
now is that he wants to meet us.
he even freakin' asked her what's the
youngest age she'd want to get
engaged! WHAT????!!!! ENGAGED???!!!
she's freakin' FOURTEEN!!!!

whew!! deep breaths again.....

wow! anyone have any advice?
part of me says, "it's not that
big of deal...they're not going
to last...they'll break up & she'll
be heart broken but will move on...
right???" so i don't want to freak
them out & i want to let her
go through this whole process...it's
part of growing up...but on the other
hand...he's 16! that's when jesse
& i started dating & WE started
talking about the "future" &
marriage within our first month of
dating, too!! look @ us...17 years
later...so it happens, right??
omg!! i think i'm gonna pass out!!

whew! deep breaths....deep breaths...
slowly....wow.

so i told her since we know about
him now, there will be no "secret"
meetings. if she wants to see him,
she can tell us. if she has nothing
to hide, then don't hide!! and
under NO circumstances is he allowed
in our house when we're not home. period!
fortunately, she's never home by
herself...so one of the other kids
will tell on her if he comes over.

okay, so doesn't this seem like she
is WAY too young for all this???!!!
seriously, next July he'll be an "adult"
technically speaking & then it will
be ILLEGAL for him to you know....so
is it weird for him to be dating a
minor??

omg!! this is freakin' too much....
share your thoughts, advice, etc.

6 comments:

Sarah E. said...

Oh hugs to you darlin! I am going to pm you on SAL.

Carla said...

calm down mom! 2 years, 2 mos is not too old. they are probably on the same maturity level, or Lica is more mature. ride it out, keep her safe and keep an eye on her.
Hugs (your little girl is growning up!)

Kathy said...

Hmmm I don't have alot of advice since my 25 yr old DD never told us anything until she was older. But you know she could have told you worse things. Think of it that way. I would definitely remind the boy that she is only 14 and make sure that he realizes what that means. You are doing fine Mom!

Dawn said...

I say - go with it for a while- Chances are they won't last!! You and Jesse are a special rare breed to be together from the beginning. She will probably grow up faster than him and move on! In the meantime- even though she "tells you everything" you might want to consider the p.i.l.l.
I'm just sayin!!
{{Hugs}} to you and Jesse! You've got your hands full!!

AliciaSharp said...

I agree with Dawn. Ride it out, chances are they might not last! Hugs to you and I hope this thing works itself out!

~*Michele*~ said...

((HUGS)) to you and Jesse! I also agree with Dawn. I would meet him though, you want him to know you and Jesse have a significant presence in her life.